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Let's start with the positive, because GoD only knows there isn't much of it. The actors on this show are damned fabulous. Generally, they're given crap to work with and they still act their asses off-- particularly Robert Carlyle and, lately, Barbara Hershey and Rose McGowan. Then there's Jane Espenson, fantastic writer. Between her and the actors, they manage to spin shit into sterling silver. (Let's face it, guys. They're not Rumplestiltskin, and their base material isn't even straw.)
There are also moments on Once Upon a Time that are so heartrendingly perfect, though, that every misstep in plotting, characterization, and pacing is thrown into ever more glaring relief.
Here's one: Regina shoved her mother's heart back inside her chest and Cora gave her daughter one brilliant, heart-felt smile of love and adoration. The next moment, she falls dying into Regina's arms. There's just enough life left in her to cry, "This would have been enough. You would have been enough."
No one mourns the wicked: most misleading Broadway song ever.
And another: Rumplestiltskin, earlier in the episode, believes that he may actually die. Belle is still mindwiped and in the hospital, but he wants to reach out to her one last time -- just to thank her, to try to give her some beauty to hold on to. He calls her up and says, "I know that you're confused about who you are, so I'm going to tell you. You are a hero who helped your people. You are a beautiful woman who loved an ugly man. Really, really loved me. You find goodness in others and when it's not there you create it. You make me want to go back, back to the best version of me. And that's never happened before. So when you look in the mirror and you don't know who you are, that's who you are."
This is followed by a heart-wrenching and laugh!sob-inducing moment between Rumplestiltskin and his estranged son Baelfire. It is absolutely no surprise that all of these scenes occurred during Espenson's latest episode, "The Miller's Daughter."
And then there's the rest of it. Let's get started with the grossest offenders, shall we? Each of these points come courtesy of nonsense in 2.13-16, or "Tiny," "Manhattan," "The Queen is Dead," and "The Miller's Daughter."
[Magic beans? Rumplestiltskin don't need no magic beans! And four other idiocies.]
There are also moments on Once Upon a Time that are so heartrendingly perfect, though, that every misstep in plotting, characterization, and pacing is thrown into ever more glaring relief.
Here's one: Regina shoved her mother's heart back inside her chest and Cora gave her daughter one brilliant, heart-felt smile of love and adoration. The next moment, she falls dying into Regina's arms. There's just enough life left in her to cry, "This would have been enough. You would have been enough."
No one mourns the wicked: most misleading Broadway song ever.
And another: Rumplestiltskin, earlier in the episode, believes that he may actually die. Belle is still mindwiped and in the hospital, but he wants to reach out to her one last time -- just to thank her, to try to give her some beauty to hold on to. He calls her up and says, "I know that you're confused about who you are, so I'm going to tell you. You are a hero who helped your people. You are a beautiful woman who loved an ugly man. Really, really loved me. You find goodness in others and when it's not there you create it. You make me want to go back, back to the best version of me. And that's never happened before. So when you look in the mirror and you don't know who you are, that's who you are."
This is followed by a heart-wrenching and laugh!sob-inducing moment between Rumplestiltskin and his estranged son Baelfire. It is absolutely no surprise that all of these scenes occurred during Espenson's latest episode, "The Miller's Daughter."
And then there's the rest of it. Let's get started with the grossest offenders, shall we? Each of these points come courtesy of nonsense in 2.13-16, or "Tiny," "Manhattan," "The Queen is Dead," and "The Miller's Daughter."
[Magic beans? Rumplestiltskin don't need no magic beans! And four other idiocies.]